1 00:00:22,618 --> 00:00:26,781 Mysteries in History, with your host, Peter Graves. 2 00:00:26,955 --> 00:00:30,892 Although no one has ever been able to prove their existence... 3 00:00:31,060 --> 00:00:34,188 ... a quasi-government agency, the Men in Black... 4 00:00:34,364 --> 00:00:37,697 ... supposedly carries out operations here on Earth... 5 00:00:37,866 --> 00:00:41,963 ... in order to keep us safe from aliens throughout the galaxies. 6 00:00:42,137 --> 00:00:45,630 Here is one of their stories that "never happened"... 7 00:00:45,807 --> 00:00:50,005 ... from one of their files that doesn't exist. 8 00:00:50,612 --> 00:00:54,777 1978. The leaders of Zartha flee their planet... 9 00:00:54,950 --> 00:01:00,183 ... in order to escape the clutches of the evil Kylothian, Serleena. 10 00:01:00,689 --> 00:01:04,592 Arriving on Earth, the Zarthans bring with them their greatest treasure: 11 00:01:04,961 --> 00:01:08,988 The Light of Zartha, a cosmic force so powerful... 12 00:01:09,164 --> 00:01:13,693 ... that in the wrong hands it could lead to the annihilation of Zartha. 13 00:01:14,202 --> 00:01:17,604 The Zarthans' princess, Lauranna, beseeched the Men in Black... 14 00:01:17,773 --> 00:01:20,140 ... to hide the Light from Serleena. 15 00:01:20,643 --> 00:01:22,610 But they had no choice. 16 00:01:22,779 --> 00:01:26,271 Intervention would have meant the destruction of the Earth. 17 00:01:27,649 --> 00:01:32,747 However, in an act of galactic bravery, the Men in Black subdued Serleena... 18 00:01:32,922 --> 00:01:35,151 ... allowing the Zarthans to escape... 19 00:01:35,324 --> 00:01:38,987 ... so they might hide the Light on another planet. 20 00:01:40,128 --> 00:01:44,792 Serleena, released from her captors, vowed that the Light would be hers... 21 00:01:44,967 --> 00:01:49,869 ... and that she would destroy any planet that stood in her way. 22 00:01:51,074 --> 00:01:53,838 And so, never knowing what happened... 23 00:01:54,009 --> 00:01:59,208 ... the people of Earth were saved by a secret society of protectors... 24 00:01:59,381 --> 00:02:02,441 ... known as the Men in Black. 25 00:03:41,617 --> 00:03:43,481 Harvey! 26 00:03:44,587 --> 00:03:47,111 Harvey, get over here! 27 00:03:47,589 --> 00:03:49,784 Harvey. Heel, heel! 28 00:03:49,958 --> 00:03:52,189 You're barking at the moon, moron. 29 00:03:52,361 --> 00:03:54,123 Harvey. Harvey! 30 00:05:55,450 --> 00:05:57,248 Hey, pretty lady. 31 00:05:58,186 --> 00:05:59,882 You taste good. 32 00:06:04,060 --> 00:06:05,322 Hey, what the--? 33 00:06:10,433 --> 00:06:12,832 Yeah, you too. 34 00:07:01,883 --> 00:07:04,351 Nothing fancy, no heroics. By the book. 35 00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:05,986 Got it. Hey! 36 00:07:07,089 --> 00:07:09,455 Hey, Jeff. What's happening, buddy? 37 00:07:09,625 --> 00:07:13,584 -We were wondering why you're here. -The man's talking to you. 38 00:07:13,928 --> 00:07:18,024 You know our arrangements. Stay in the E, F and R subway lines... 39 00:07:18,200 --> 00:07:20,633 ... and you get all the garbage you want. 40 00:07:20,803 --> 00:07:23,567 What the hell are you doing here, worm boy? 41 00:07:23,738 --> 00:07:24,727 Tee. 42 00:07:25,340 --> 00:07:26,671 Jeff... . 43 00:07:26,842 --> 00:07:29,036 Excuse my partner. He's new and he's... 44 00:07:30,246 --> 00:07:35,250 ... kind of stupid. 45 00:07:42,892 --> 00:07:45,861 You getting big, Jeff. Boy, what you been eating? 46 00:07:50,032 --> 00:07:51,829 You like jokes, huh? 47 00:07:54,370 --> 00:07:55,996 Jeffrey! 48 00:08:03,077 --> 00:08:04,306 All right. 49 00:08:05,781 --> 00:08:07,611 Sweet dreams, big boy. 50 00:08:42,651 --> 00:08:44,209 Sweet dreams... 51 00:08:48,958 --> 00:08:50,425 ... big boy. 52 00:08:50,593 --> 00:08:53,357 Transit authority. Move to the forward car. 53 00:08:53,528 --> 00:08:56,123 We got a bug in the electrical system. 54 00:08:58,166 --> 00:09:03,229 People! We got a bug in the electrical system! 55 00:09:07,075 --> 00:09:08,771 Now y'all running? 56 00:09:08,944 --> 00:09:10,638 No, no, no! Sit down! 57 00:09:10,812 --> 00:09:12,781 It's only a 600-foot worm. 58 00:09:16,051 --> 00:09:20,112 -Everybody out. -Put the hammer down on this thing. 59 00:09:20,288 --> 00:09:23,747 I'm Captain Larry Bridgewater. I decide what happens. 60 00:09:23,926 --> 00:09:26,554 You decide? Okay, come here. Come here. 61 00:09:26,729 --> 00:09:28,787 Larry? That's my man, Jeff. 62 00:09:32,133 --> 00:09:36,297 -Larry just made a decision. -Larry need to take his ass in there. 63 00:09:43,811 --> 00:09:46,280 Don't make me do this, Jeff! 64 00:10:12,141 --> 00:10:13,937 Eighty-first Street. 65 00:10:18,012 --> 00:10:19,138 Just a second. 66 00:10:20,482 --> 00:10:23,315 May I have your attention, please? 67 00:10:23,852 --> 00:10:26,719 We thank you for participating in our drill. 68 00:10:26,888 --> 00:10:29,949 Had this been an emergency, you'd have been eaten. 69 00:10:30,124 --> 00:10:32,685 Because you don't listen. You're ignorant. 70 00:10:32,860 --> 00:10:37,025 How a man gonna bash through--? That's the problem with New Yorkers. 71 00:10:37,199 --> 00:10:40,828 "We've seen it all. A 600-foot worm! Save us, Mr. Black Man!" 72 00:10:41,003 --> 00:10:45,200 I ask you nice, "Move to the next car. " You just sit there like-- 73 00:10:47,142 --> 00:10:48,802 Thank you for participating. 74 00:10:48,978 --> 00:10:52,879 Hopefully, you enjoyed our smaller, energy-efficient subway cars. 75 00:10:53,349 --> 00:10:56,442 Watch your step. You will have a nice evening. 76 00:11:00,022 --> 00:11:03,617 I need a cleanup crew at 81st and Central Park West. 77 00:11:03,791 --> 00:11:06,282 Revoke Jeff's movement privileges. 78 00:11:06,461 --> 00:11:09,295 Have him escorted to the Chamber Street station. 79 00:11:09,464 --> 00:11:14,425 And please check the expiration date on the unipod worm tranquilizers. 80 00:11:18,773 --> 00:11:20,604 Sorry, fellas. Station closed. 81 00:11:20,908 --> 00:11:25,141 -Emergency drill. For your safety. -Do you believe these putzes? 82 00:11:26,748 --> 00:11:28,238 You're welcome. 83 00:11:41,930 --> 00:11:44,160 I know, by the book. 84 00:11:44,333 --> 00:11:48,792 Tee, when was the last time we just looked at the stars? 85 00:11:48,970 --> 00:11:51,963 This is a test. I can do this. 86 00:11:54,410 --> 00:11:56,969 Ever feel like you're alone in the universe? 87 00:11:57,146 --> 00:11:58,636 Yes. 88 00:12:00,648 --> 00:12:02,276 No. 89 00:12:04,552 --> 00:12:07,579 -Hey, let me buy you a piece of pie. -Really? 90 00:12:08,323 --> 00:12:09,551 Thanks. 91 00:12:10,325 --> 00:12:13,089 Hey, you're not alone in the universe. 92 00:12:13,262 --> 00:12:15,456 -Remove the arm. -Okay. 93 00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:16,464 Please, shut up, Charlie. 94 00:12:16,464 --> 00:12:21,469 Please, shut up, Charlie. 95 00:12:21,536 --> 00:12:24,335 I'm tired of you constantly talking behind my back. 96 00:12:26,108 --> 00:12:29,975 You meet a girl. She's into it. The best line you come up with is: 97 00:12:30,144 --> 00:12:34,275 "Wanna come back to my place for some tonsil hockey and egg salad?" 98 00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:38,108 -Who are you and how'd you get in here? -You like egg salad? 99 00:12:41,389 --> 00:12:42,788 Serleena! 100 00:12:42,958 --> 00:12:46,189 Why didn't you say it was you? 101 00:12:46,994 --> 00:12:49,555 -Where's the Light? -Here's the deal. 102 00:12:49,732 --> 00:12:52,098 You're looking for this Light. We found it. 103 00:12:52,267 --> 00:12:56,566 You want it, it'll cost you 50 mill. Here's how it'll work. First-- 104 00:12:56,738 --> 00:12:59,674 Where is the Light? 105 00:13:04,613 --> 00:13:08,946 We couldn't find it, but we found a guy who might know where it is. 106 00:13:09,118 --> 00:13:12,177 He runs a pizza parlor on Spring Street. 107 00:13:13,488 --> 00:13:17,323 Let's go. And wipe your nose, idiot. 108 00:13:23,766 --> 00:13:26,495 -Good pie. -Yeah. 109 00:13:28,003 --> 00:13:29,493 Crowded. 110 00:13:29,671 --> 00:13:31,434 Well, they got good pie. 111 00:13:36,911 --> 00:13:38,243 What is wrong with you? 112 00:13:38,412 --> 00:13:40,608 -You're gonna neuralyze me. -No, I'm not. 113 00:13:40,782 --> 00:13:43,343 You took me here so I wouldn't make a scene. 114 00:13:43,518 --> 00:13:45,315 You making a scene. 115 00:13:46,021 --> 00:13:49,354 Let me ask you a question. Why did you join MiB? 116 00:13:49,525 --> 00:13:53,051 Six years in the Marines. I like the action. Protect the planet. 117 00:13:53,228 --> 00:13:56,527 You like being a hero? You joined the wrong organization. 118 00:13:57,232 --> 00:14:00,690 -You ever heard of James Edwards? -No. 119 00:14:01,136 --> 00:14:04,867 Well, he saved the lives of 85 people on the subway tonight. 120 00:14:05,040 --> 00:14:07,065 No one knows he exists. 121 00:14:07,575 --> 00:14:12,479 And if no one knows he exists, how can anyone ever love him? 122 00:14:16,251 --> 00:14:18,480 Hey, how long we been partners? 123 00:14:18,653 --> 00:14:21,623 -Feb 1. -Five months, three days. 124 00:14:21,790 --> 00:14:24,485 -Started at noon. -Nine hours. 125 00:14:31,532 --> 00:14:34,001 Get married. Have a bunch of kids. 126 00:14:34,503 --> 00:14:36,163 Okay. 127 00:14:38,907 --> 00:14:44,435 Excuse me. My buddy's kind of shy, but he thinks you are hot. 128 00:14:49,785 --> 00:14:50,773 Here it is. 129 00:14:52,387 --> 00:14:53,854 I don't know what to say. 130 00:14:54,022 --> 00:14:56,956 Years from now, you know what people'll say? 131 00:14:57,124 --> 00:15:00,458 -"Employee" is misspelled? -They charge by the letter. 132 00:15:00,628 --> 00:15:04,758 They'll say, "lmagine that. Big shot like her used to work here. " 133 00:15:04,932 --> 00:15:06,331 -Ben-- -You deserve it. 134 00:15:06,501 --> 00:15:09,628 Bring up a case of Mountain Dew from the basement. 135 00:15:12,407 --> 00:15:14,204 Hey, Bruno. 136 00:15:15,210 --> 00:15:19,738 Two slices of pepperoni and information about the Light of Zartha. 137 00:15:19,915 --> 00:15:23,282 -Whoever you are, don't hurt me. -Where's the Light, Ben? 138 00:15:23,451 --> 00:15:26,887 I don't know what you're talking about. Let me down, ma'am. 139 00:15:27,055 --> 00:15:29,147 I want to report a robbery-- 140 00:15:36,632 --> 00:15:38,224 There. 141 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:40,061 Noise. 142 00:15:41,570 --> 00:15:43,036 Kitchen! 143 00:15:47,041 --> 00:15:49,134 You idiots see anything? 144 00:15:49,310 --> 00:15:52,336 Wind blew the door open. 145 00:15:53,014 --> 00:15:54,983 Nothing out of the ordinary. 146 00:15:55,349 --> 00:15:58,478 For 25 years, I've traveled the universe looking for it. 147 00:15:58,653 --> 00:16:01,589 But it never left Earth, did it? You kept it here. 148 00:16:01,757 --> 00:16:03,485 What are you talking about? 149 00:16:03,658 --> 00:16:06,184 I'm running out of time. Where's the Light? 150 00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:09,158 -I don't know what you mean. -Listen, Zarthan. 151 00:16:09,330 --> 00:16:11,891 You hid the Light on Earth. I'll find it. 152 00:16:12,066 --> 00:16:15,594 Once we have the Light, Zartha will be ours. 153 00:16:15,771 --> 00:16:18,330 You're too late. Tomorrow at midnight... 154 00:16:18,507 --> 00:16:22,033 ... the Light will leave the third planet and be back home. 155 00:16:22,210 --> 00:16:25,474 Sorry you made the trip for nothing. 156 00:16:34,756 --> 00:16:37,315 Now we don't know if it's on Earth or not. 157 00:16:37,492 --> 00:16:39,892 He said third planet. It's here, you idiot. 158 00:16:40,061 --> 00:16:43,758 -Third Rock from the Sun. -I never got that till now. 159 00:16:44,266 --> 00:16:48,133 It's on Earth, and I know who's gonna tell me where it is. 160 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:15,623 -Don't you ever go home? -Nope. 161 00:17:15,796 --> 00:17:18,594 I see you neuralyzed another partner. 162 00:17:25,172 --> 00:17:27,835 Bee, Dee, when you use a fission carbonizer... 163 00:17:28,009 --> 00:17:31,740 ... attach a de-atomizer so it doesn't sound like a cannon. 164 00:17:31,912 --> 00:17:36,212 Hey, get some booties on them things. You're crapping up the floor. 165 00:17:39,621 --> 00:17:41,019 Check his visa. 166 00:17:41,189 --> 00:17:45,353 The Cephalopods have been making counterfeits at Kinko's on Canal. 167 00:17:45,527 --> 00:17:50,794 And why do I have a dead Tricrainasloph going through passport control? 168 00:17:50,966 --> 00:17:55,130 That'd be my fault. I'm very sorry. Please don't neuralyze me, sir. 169 00:17:55,303 --> 00:17:58,829 -What the hell's that supposed to mean? -Nothing, sir. 170 00:18:02,344 --> 00:18:03,902 Good work in the subway. 171 00:18:04,078 --> 00:18:07,980 -I remember Jeff when he was yea high. -What you got for me? 172 00:18:08,150 --> 00:18:10,448 Look. See those guys in black suits? 173 00:18:10,619 --> 00:18:13,679 -They work here. We got it covered. -Zed, what you got? 174 00:18:13,854 --> 00:18:18,086 Dedication's one thing, but this job will eat you up and spit you out. 175 00:18:18,259 --> 00:18:21,229 You want to look like me when you hit 50... 176 00:18:22,530 --> 00:18:23,555 ... ish? 177 00:18:24,432 --> 00:18:26,662 I'll be in the gym if you need me. 178 00:18:27,302 --> 00:18:30,669 All right, there was a killing earlier. 177 Spring. 179 00:18:30,838 --> 00:18:32,135 Alien-on-alien. 180 00:18:32,306 --> 00:18:34,832 Take Tee with you and make a report. 181 00:18:36,678 --> 00:18:36,710 Tee. Right. 182 00:18:36,710 --> 00:18:41,716 Tee. Right. 183 00:18:43,751 --> 00:18:46,777 You have got to stop neuralyzing MiB personnel. 184 00:18:46,954 --> 00:18:49,184 He was crying in the middle of the diner. 185 00:18:49,356 --> 00:18:50,881 I hate that. 186 00:18:51,492 --> 00:18:53,688 And plus, you can't count Elle. 187 00:18:53,862 --> 00:18:56,796 She wanted to go back to the morgue. I helped her. 188 00:18:56,965 --> 00:18:59,865 -You need a partner. -I'm cool. 189 00:19:00,168 --> 00:19:02,159 I'll be his partner. 190 00:19:03,037 --> 00:19:06,029 Jay, wait up. I appreciate the shot, man. 191 00:19:06,208 --> 00:19:08,402 -Thought I'd never get out. -Lose the suit. 192 00:19:08,576 --> 00:19:10,771 Sure thing. Just going for the look. 193 00:19:10,946 --> 00:19:13,642 But if I say so myself, I find it slimming. 194 00:19:13,815 --> 00:19:16,442 Not that I've had problems with the ladies. 195 00:19:16,617 --> 00:19:18,210 When you get down to-- 196 00:19:18,385 --> 00:19:20,114 Nice sled, very swank. 197 00:19:20,287 --> 00:19:22,414 Heated seats? Sometimes I get hives. 198 00:19:43,879 --> 00:19:45,210 Frank! 199 00:19:46,148 --> 00:19:49,709 Bring your head in this window before I roll it up in there. 200 00:19:49,884 --> 00:19:51,249 Got it. 201 00:19:57,258 --> 00:19:58,691 Frank! 202 00:19:59,995 --> 00:20:01,929 My money? It's missionary. 203 00:20:02,096 --> 00:20:05,156 I was in the Bowery, and I meet this Great Dane. 204 00:20:05,333 --> 00:20:07,596 A little thick in the body, but pretty. 205 00:20:07,768 --> 00:20:10,863 That's just not appealing to me, man. Seriously. 206 00:20:11,038 --> 00:20:13,336 I say we do the good cop, bad cop thing. 207 00:20:13,508 --> 00:20:16,067 You interrogate the witness and I growl. 208 00:20:16,244 --> 00:20:20,476 How about we do the good cop, dumb dog thing, and you just shut up? 209 00:20:20,649 --> 00:20:23,015 You got it, partner. Total silence. 210 00:20:23,184 --> 00:20:26,517 Absolute quiet. Not a word out of me. 211 00:20:27,255 --> 00:20:28,846 What do we got? 212 00:20:31,593 --> 00:20:34,460 -What do we got? -There's residue on the wall. 213 00:20:34,629 --> 00:20:39,531 -We sent samples to Em for analysis. -Hey,0% body fat. 214 00:20:42,304 --> 00:20:43,965 -Funny. -Witness? 215 00:20:44,873 --> 00:20:46,465 Girl. Saw everything. 216 00:20:47,842 --> 00:20:49,207 She's taking it well. 217 00:20:49,376 --> 00:20:53,540 I won't answer any more questions. I want to know what happened here. 218 00:20:53,882 --> 00:20:56,008 -I'll handle this one. -You got it. 219 00:20:56,183 --> 00:20:59,550 Alone. A talking dog might be a bit much for her now. 220 00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:01,779 What do you want me to do? 221 00:21:02,090 --> 00:21:04,149 Sniff around. 222 00:21:04,726 --> 00:21:06,249 What? 223 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:07,886 Funny. 224 00:21:08,063 --> 00:21:10,530 Take a deep breath. Everything is all right. 225 00:21:10,699 --> 00:21:13,826 What part is she supposed to feel all right about? 226 00:21:17,072 --> 00:21:18,595 I'm Agent Jay. 227 00:21:18,773 --> 00:21:20,263 Tell me what you saw. 228 00:21:20,441 --> 00:21:22,967 -A two-headed guy and a woman. -Caucasian? 229 00:21:23,143 --> 00:21:26,135 Gray, with tentacles that she used to rip-- 230 00:21:26,314 --> 00:21:27,372 His skin off. 231 00:21:27,548 --> 00:21:32,851 It's not skin. It's protoplasma polymer similar to the gum in baseball cards. 232 00:21:33,020 --> 00:21:35,581 -What was the last thing you ate? -Calzone. 233 00:21:35,757 --> 00:21:36,883 -What time? -Lunch. 234 00:21:37,057 --> 00:21:39,423 -Spinach? -Mushroom. 235 00:21:40,295 --> 00:21:41,853 You need pie. 236 00:21:41,930 --> 00:21:41,962 They kept asking Ben about a light. 237 00:21:41,962 --> 00:21:46,968 They kept asking Ben about a light. 238 00:21:47,902 --> 00:21:49,425 You okay? 239 00:21:49,604 --> 00:21:52,902 An hour ago, a man I've known my whole life vanished... 240 00:21:53,074 --> 00:21:55,668 ... because of a woman with weird fingers... 241 00:21:55,844 --> 00:21:58,539 ... and a two-headed guy with a cannoli's IQ. 242 00:21:58,712 --> 00:22:01,374 So yeah, everything's okay. 243 00:22:02,950 --> 00:22:06,681 When we're kids, before we're taught how to think... 244 00:22:06,854 --> 00:22:10,188 ... our hearts tell us there is something else out there. 245 00:22:10,357 --> 00:22:15,260 I know what I saw. Tell me what I'm supposed to believe. 246 00:22:20,902 --> 00:22:26,033 I'm a member of a secret organization that monitors alien activity on Earth. 247 00:22:26,207 --> 00:22:28,402 Ben was an alien. So were his killers. 248 00:22:28,575 --> 00:22:32,568 I don't know why they did it, but I promise I'm gonna find out. 249 00:22:33,847 --> 00:22:35,815 Okay. 250 00:22:36,217 --> 00:22:38,741 -Okay? -Okay. 251 00:22:40,154 --> 00:22:41,587 Okay. 252 00:22:46,894 --> 00:22:49,659 -I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to-- -Kill me. 253 00:22:49,831 --> 00:22:51,354 No! 254 00:22:51,533 --> 00:22:55,469 Just a little flash and everything goes back the way it was. 255 00:22:55,903 --> 00:22:59,237 After you flash me... 256 00:22:59,406 --> 00:23:01,841 ... if I see you again, will I know it's you? 257 00:23:02,009 --> 00:23:04,035 I'll see you. 258 00:23:06,715 --> 00:23:08,443 But you won't see me. 259 00:23:08,615 --> 00:23:10,674 Must be hard. 260 00:23:10,852 --> 00:23:12,751 Must be very lonely. 261 00:23:28,536 --> 00:23:29,525 Excuse me. 262 00:23:30,872 --> 00:23:33,863 -I gotta go. -What about the flashy thing? 263 00:23:35,043 --> 00:23:37,671 I'll flash you some other time. 264 00:23:55,462 --> 00:23:57,090 What? 265 00:24:01,736 --> 00:24:07,140 -Did you tell the girl you love her? -She's a witness to a crime. That's it. 266 00:24:07,776 --> 00:24:11,404 You're attracted. She's not my species, and I'm attracted. 267 00:24:11,578 --> 00:24:15,537 I should take advice on love from a dude that chases his own ass? 268 00:24:15,717 --> 00:24:19,744 Easy, pal. That's canine profiling, and I resent it. 269 00:24:36,470 --> 00:24:37,802 Hey, Jay, wait up. 270 00:24:37,971 --> 00:24:40,998 Coming through. MiB brass. Look sharp. 271 00:24:41,175 --> 00:24:45,112 I'm Agent Eff, Jay's new partner. Who are you eyeballing? 272 00:24:45,279 --> 00:24:47,544 Frank, just cool out, dog. 273 00:24:49,316 --> 00:24:50,874 -Got kids? -No. 274 00:24:51,052 --> 00:24:52,518 Want them? 275 00:24:55,722 --> 00:24:57,690 Get him off me! 276 00:25:06,066 --> 00:25:08,729 -Talk to me. -lt's Kylothian, class C. 277 00:25:08,902 --> 00:25:09,892 Serleena. 278 00:25:10,071 --> 00:25:12,402 -Serleena. Old girlfriend? -She wishes. 279 00:25:12,574 --> 00:25:15,269 The perps were looking for the Light of-- 280 00:25:15,442 --> 00:25:17,104 -Zartha. -Yeah, what is it? 281 00:25:17,277 --> 00:25:19,746 This makes no sense. It's not on Earth. 282 00:25:19,913 --> 00:25:23,179 -We took care of this a long time ago. -Obviously not. 283 00:25:23,351 --> 00:25:25,375 That is very bad news. 284 00:25:25,553 --> 00:25:29,249 The Zarthans came to Earth to hide the Light from Serleena. 285 00:25:29,423 --> 00:25:32,915 -We don't do that. -Right. I ordered it off the planet. 286 00:25:33,094 --> 00:25:34,720 Well, Zed... . 287 00:25:34,895 --> 00:25:39,333 I got a Kylothian class C in my park. Are you sure this Light isn't here? 288 00:25:39,500 --> 00:25:43,095 Positive. I gave the order. My best agent carried it out. 289 00:25:43,270 --> 00:25:45,831 -lt's as if I gave it to you. -Ask the agent. 290 00:25:46,007 --> 00:25:47,098 -Can't. -Dead? 291 00:25:47,275 --> 00:25:50,438 Sort of. He works at the post office. 292 00:25:51,613 --> 00:25:52,738 No. 293 00:25:52,913 --> 00:25:55,575 If Serleena gets to Kay before we do, he's dead. 294 00:25:55,749 --> 00:25:58,776 The Earth's very existence may rest on what Kay knows. 295 00:25:58,952 --> 00:26:01,421 Too bad you wiped out his memory of it. 296 00:26:01,588 --> 00:26:03,078 Bring him in. 297 00:26:03,458 --> 00:26:04,447 Now. 298 00:26:04,625 --> 00:26:08,687 How cool is this? Going to get Kay. The legend, the go-to guy. 299 00:26:08,863 --> 00:26:11,388 The guy who taught you everything. 300 00:26:11,565 --> 00:26:16,196 -The greatest agent in MiB history! -Frank! Stop talking. 301 00:26:20,008 --> 00:26:21,305 Stay. 302 00:26:21,476 --> 00:26:24,069 Listen, partner. I may look like a dog... 303 00:26:24,245 --> 00:26:26,712 ... but I only play one here on Earth. 304 00:26:27,081 --> 00:26:29,548 -Whatever. Wipe your mouth. -Hey, babe. 305 00:26:35,923 --> 00:26:39,222 People of Truro, may I kindly have your attention? 306 00:26:39,393 --> 00:26:41,827 To facilitate your shipping needs... 307 00:26:41,996 --> 00:26:44,658 ... all packages must be properly wrapped. 308 00:26:44,832 --> 00:26:48,700 This one is an example of "go home and do it again. " 309 00:26:48,870 --> 00:26:51,668 I think you know what I mean, Mrs. Vigushin. 310 00:26:51,838 --> 00:26:56,708 Brown paper and triple-twist twine are the preferred media. 311 00:26:56,877 --> 00:26:58,606 Thank you for your time. 312 00:26:59,980 --> 00:27:02,710 -Kay. -C. Express mail, two-day air. 313 00:27:04,652 --> 00:27:05,777 Kevin. 314 00:27:07,488 --> 00:27:10,684 Kevin. That's funny. You don't have a "Kevin"... . 315 00:27:13,428 --> 00:27:15,658 You don't remember. We worked together. 316 00:27:15,829 --> 00:27:19,925 I never worked in a funeral home. Something I can do for you, slick? 317 00:27:20,101 --> 00:27:21,728 Straight to the point. 318 00:27:22,469 --> 00:27:26,701 You were an agent of an organization that monitors aliens on Earth. 319 00:27:26,873 --> 00:27:30,934 We're the Men in Black. We have a situation. We need your help. 320 00:27:31,112 --> 00:27:34,843 There is a free mental health clinic on the corner of Lilac. 321 00:27:35,016 --> 00:27:36,983 -Next. -Excuse me. 322 00:27:37,517 --> 00:27:39,543 -Twenty Rugrats stamps. -Elizabeth. 323 00:27:39,720 --> 00:27:44,020 The Postal Service hasn't kept up with today's youth, but we have... 324 00:27:44,191 --> 00:27:46,854 ... Berlin airlift stamps. Opera legends? 325 00:27:47,027 --> 00:27:49,997 American Samoa? Amish quilts. 326 00:27:50,163 --> 00:27:52,893 I'm sorry, got a world to save here. 327 00:27:54,267 --> 00:27:56,293 There was no coma. It was a cover. 328 00:27:56,470 --> 00:27:58,267 -Who are you? -Who are you? 329 00:27:58,439 --> 00:28:02,738 The postmaster of Truro, Massachusetts, and I'm ordering you to leave. 330 00:28:05,646 --> 00:28:07,113 -ls that decaf? -Sorry. 331 00:28:07,280 --> 00:28:09,646 We have a breach. Cordon off this area. 332 00:28:09,816 --> 00:28:12,808 Full perimeter wipe-down, right here, right now. 333 00:28:12,987 --> 00:28:17,390 Get a mop and escort all civilian personnel from this site immediately. 334 00:28:17,557 --> 00:28:20,720 Listen to yourself, Kay. Who talks like that? 335 00:29:16,718 --> 00:29:19,585 Why do you think you're so comfortable here? 336 00:29:21,154 --> 00:29:24,988 Just about everybody who works in a post office is an alien. 337 00:29:32,667 --> 00:29:34,691 No smoking. 338 00:29:43,611 --> 00:29:44,737 Kay. 339 00:29:45,046 --> 00:29:48,674 My wife and I saw Siegfried and Roy fly a tiger around a room. 340 00:29:48,850 --> 00:29:50,340 You're nothing special. 341 00:29:50,517 --> 00:29:53,419 When you look at the stars, you get a feeling... 342 00:29:53,587 --> 00:29:55,578 ... like you don't know who you are. 343 00:29:55,757 --> 00:29:59,385 Like you know more about out there than you do down here. 344 00:29:59,559 --> 00:30:04,155 That's why she left you, Kay. That's why your wife left you. 345 00:30:06,167 --> 00:30:07,998 Okay, I'll tell you what. 346 00:30:08,169 --> 00:30:12,071 You want to know who you really are, take a ride with me. 347 00:30:12,239 --> 00:30:16,107 If not, people are waiting for their TV Guides. 348 00:30:19,279 --> 00:30:20,769 Think he'll bite? 349 00:30:26,687 --> 00:30:30,418 I'm just going for a ride. If things don't add up, it's hasta luego. 350 00:30:30,591 --> 00:30:32,149 Hey, Kay. 351 00:30:33,494 --> 00:30:35,758 How's it hanging? 352 00:30:50,076 --> 00:30:51,908 Good to see you, Kay. 353 00:30:52,078 --> 00:30:55,139 Good to see you too, whoever you are. 354 00:30:56,517 --> 00:31:00,715 Well, let's see what you got here, chief. 355 00:31:11,164 --> 00:31:13,462 Welcome back, Agent Kay. 356 00:31:14,701 --> 00:31:15,998 Agent Kay. 357 00:31:16,604 --> 00:31:18,730 Greetings, Kay. 358 00:31:20,874 --> 00:31:22,206 Wow, look who's back. 359 00:31:22,375 --> 00:31:24,936 I don't mean to bother you-- You're Agent Kay! 360 00:31:25,112 --> 00:31:28,275 -That's what they tell me. -This is an honor. Agent Gee. 361 00:31:28,449 --> 00:31:30,917 The most respected agent in MiB history. 362 00:31:31,085 --> 00:31:33,575 The most feared human in the universe. 363 00:31:33,754 --> 00:31:36,722 Maybe I could buy you a cup of coffee? 364 00:31:36,891 --> 00:31:39,553 -Black, two sugars, if you're going. -An honor. 365 00:31:39,727 --> 00:31:43,094 -Yeah, I'll take a--My man? -Good to see you, Kay. 366 00:31:44,765 --> 00:31:46,163 How'd it go? 367 00:31:46,334 --> 00:31:48,802 The Drolacks are gone and the treaty is signed. 368 00:31:48,969 --> 00:31:49,959 Good work. 369 00:31:50,136 --> 00:31:53,469 What about that position you promised me in Men in Black? 370 00:31:53,641 --> 00:31:57,076 Still working on the alien affirmative action program. 371 00:31:57,245 --> 00:31:59,508 That's not what you promised me. 372 00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:01,773 -You're breaking up. -Zed? Hello? 373 00:32:01,949 --> 00:32:05,544 -I'll call you back. -I could be Agent Em. Zed, you-- 374 00:32:06,286 --> 00:32:11,054 I think Earth might be in a bad way. You're the only one that could save it. 375 00:32:11,225 --> 00:32:14,318 -Well, neither rain, sleet, snow... . -Good man. 376 00:32:14,495 --> 00:32:18,396 Get him armed and up to speed and over to deneuralyzation. 377 00:32:19,566 --> 00:32:20,692 -Frank? -Yeah? 378 00:32:20,902 --> 00:32:23,836 I'm gonna need them together on this one. 379 00:32:24,337 --> 00:32:27,967 I need an assistant. It's not field work, but you get dental. 380 00:32:28,142 --> 00:32:29,632 Dental? 381 00:32:32,179 --> 00:32:34,114 The most advanced technologies from all over the universe are in this room. 382 00:32:34,114 --> 00:32:36,584 The most advanced technologies from all over the universe are in this room. 383 00:32:36,584 --> 00:32:38,085 What's this? 384 00:32:39,353 --> 00:32:42,219 All is lost! All is lost! 385 00:32:43,290 --> 00:32:44,848 Don't touch that! 386 00:32:45,793 --> 00:32:47,692 I didn't do anything. 387 00:32:47,862 --> 00:32:51,025 Hands in your pockets. 388 00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:02,602 Your favorite weapon. 389 00:33:05,379 --> 00:33:07,642 -That? -Yep. 390 00:33:08,149 --> 00:33:10,241 -Let's go put it on. -What? 391 00:33:10,418 --> 00:33:12,749 The last suit you'll ever wear. 392 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:14,478 Again. 393 00:33:21,594 --> 00:33:22,925 The deneuralyzer. 394 00:33:24,498 --> 00:33:27,557 Magneto-energy will surge through your brain... 395 00:33:27,735 --> 00:33:32,331 ... unlocking information that could hold the key to Earth's very survival. 396 00:33:32,506 --> 00:33:35,168 Okay. What's that thing? 397 00:33:36,544 --> 00:33:38,568 The deneuralyzer. 398 00:33:46,019 --> 00:33:50,046 Welcome to planet Earth. There are some rules and regulations. 399 00:33:50,223 --> 00:33:51,623 Go out only at night. 400 00:33:51,792 --> 00:33:56,024 If you must go out during the daylight, only the East Village. 401 00:34:00,468 --> 00:34:01,991 Hey, hey, hey, hey! 402 00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:09,141 Name and planet of origin? 403 00:34:09,309 --> 00:34:13,041 Sylona Gorth. Planet Jorn. Kaluth system. 404 00:34:14,048 --> 00:34:18,074 -Any fruits or vegetables? -Yeah, two heads of cabbage. 405 00:34:18,251 --> 00:34:19,240 Reason for visit? 406 00:34:19,420 --> 00:34:22,947 Education. I want to learn how to be an underwear model. 407 00:34:23,124 --> 00:34:25,853 They told me I've got real potential. 408 00:34:28,396 --> 00:34:30,193 Help! Heart attack! 409 00:34:31,432 --> 00:34:32,865 Clear! 410 00:34:34,135 --> 00:34:36,126 Wake up, champ! 411 00:34:41,342 --> 00:34:44,833 -Oh, jeez. -Lockdown. Code 101. 412 00:34:45,780 --> 00:34:47,713 Lockdown. 413 00:34:48,615 --> 00:34:51,244 This is not good. This is not good. 414 00:34:57,925 --> 00:35:00,916 -Breach! We're being flushed. -Flushed? 415 00:35:01,494 --> 00:35:04,623 -Ever been to a water park? -I don't know. 416 00:35:38,465 --> 00:35:39,796 Flushed. 417 00:35:41,267 --> 00:35:45,398 Yeah, man, back when you was an agent, you loved getting flushed. 418 00:35:45,572 --> 00:35:50,168 Yeah, every Saturday night, you'd be like, "Flush me, Jay. Flush me. " 419 00:35:50,344 --> 00:35:52,072 I'd be like, "No. " 420 00:35:53,713 --> 00:35:55,204 You can't quit on me. 421 00:35:55,382 --> 00:35:58,282 I save the world, you tell me why I stare at the stars. 422 00:35:58,452 --> 00:36:00,010 Cool. 423 00:36:02,289 --> 00:36:04,291 -Hop in. -Hop in what? 424 00:36:10,164 --> 00:36:11,688 Does that come standard? 425 00:36:11,865 --> 00:36:15,996 It came with a black dude, but he kept getting pulled over. 426 00:36:18,505 --> 00:36:23,409 I could rule this place with the right set of mammary glands. 427 00:36:23,777 --> 00:36:25,335 Trapped like rats... 428 00:36:26,079 --> 00:36:27,137 ... in a Chia Pet. 429 00:36:27,313 --> 00:36:29,907 Computer, surveillance MiB. 430 00:36:34,688 --> 00:36:36,519 MiB's locked down. 431 00:36:38,626 --> 00:36:42,220 Computer, magnify. Times 10. 432 00:36:43,363 --> 00:36:45,264 Communicator. Frank. 433 00:36:45,532 --> 00:36:47,865 -Jay, where are you? -We got flushed. 434 00:36:48,034 --> 00:36:50,195 -MiB's code 101. -Yeah, who did it? 435 00:36:50,371 --> 00:36:53,340 Some hot-looking biker chick. Want me to tail her? 436 00:36:53,507 --> 00:36:58,376 -Stay where you are. I'll be in touch. -Stay where I am. Easy for you to say. 437 00:36:58,545 --> 00:36:59,945 -Find Kay? -Neuralyzed. 438 00:37:00,113 --> 00:37:02,742 -Not active. Civilian. -What? 439 00:37:02,916 --> 00:37:03,941 -He was-- -Here. 440 00:37:04,117 --> 00:37:05,449 -To get-- -Deneuralyzed. 441 00:37:05,619 --> 00:37:10,146 -Memory's shot. But we'll find him. -Don't put anything in our ears. 442 00:37:11,124 --> 00:37:12,113 What? 443 00:37:12,293 --> 00:37:15,751 What do you make of that? Found it in my pocket. Weird, huh? 444 00:37:15,929 --> 00:37:18,659 -Yeah, a smile. -ls that the only deneuralyzer? 445 00:37:18,831 --> 00:37:21,766 Officially. The plans leaked out on the Internet. 446 00:37:21,936 --> 00:37:23,927 Computer, Internet. 447 00:37:24,103 --> 00:37:25,934 Deneuralyzer. 448 00:37:30,010 --> 00:37:31,978 Perfect. It's an old friend. 449 00:37:39,753 --> 00:37:41,778 Jay, ain't seen you in a while. 450 00:37:41,956 --> 00:37:44,686 Did you peep that drop-top thing out front? 451 00:37:44,858 --> 00:37:46,985 My business is banging, dog. 452 00:37:47,494 --> 00:37:50,860 You gotta check out the website. It's Jeebsie dot-- 453 00:37:51,097 --> 00:37:53,123 Okay, whoa. He's retired, right? 454 00:37:53,566 --> 00:37:55,329 We need the deneuralyzer. 455 00:37:55,501 --> 00:37:58,835 -You're kidding. -The meter's running, Jeebs. 456 00:38:01,242 --> 00:38:03,472 Do you remember me? 457 00:38:04,010 --> 00:38:06,103 Can't say I do. I'm good with faces. 458 00:38:06,713 --> 00:38:08,409 I think I'd remember that. 459 00:38:09,617 --> 00:38:11,675 The great Kay's a neutral. 460 00:38:11,851 --> 00:38:16,152 You're between me and my memories. Do you have this deneuralyzer or not? 461 00:38:16,322 --> 00:38:17,653 No. 462 00:38:18,791 --> 00:38:20,282 Fresh out. 463 00:38:21,528 --> 00:38:23,188 Can't help you. 464 00:38:25,266 --> 00:38:26,789 Don't got it. 465 00:38:35,476 --> 00:38:39,378 Even if I did, if it doesn't work, he dies, you blow my head off. 466 00:38:39,545 --> 00:38:43,572 If it does, I've brought back Kay, who, for fun, blows my head off. 467 00:38:43,751 --> 00:38:45,650 So, what's my incentive? 468 00:38:46,019 --> 00:38:50,150 Okay, homey, I keep it downstairs next to the snow blowers. 469 00:38:53,661 --> 00:38:56,891 Alien prisoners released, armed and ready for your orders. 470 00:38:57,063 --> 00:39:00,499 Prisoners of MiB, the scum of the universe. 471 00:39:00,934 --> 00:39:02,525 Now it's the scum's turn. 472 00:39:02,702 --> 00:39:05,137 I'm in a jam, so I'll make this simple. 473 00:39:05,572 --> 00:39:09,007 I need the Light of Zartha, and Kay knows where it is. 474 00:39:09,175 --> 00:39:11,507 Whoever brings Kay to me gets Earth. 475 00:39:11,679 --> 00:39:14,978 Find a deneuralyzer. They want his memory back. 476 00:39:15,148 --> 00:39:16,979 Check. 477 00:39:17,650 --> 00:39:19,175 Now. 478 00:39:22,588 --> 00:39:24,557 Jarra, good to see you. 479 00:39:28,528 --> 00:39:30,429 Okay, that should do it. 480 00:39:30,597 --> 00:39:34,965 If I could have your attention while we go over the safety procedures. 481 00:39:35,135 --> 00:39:37,659 Keep your hands inside the vehicle. 482 00:39:37,838 --> 00:39:40,932 lf, during the ride, you become disoriented... 483 00:39:41,108 --> 00:39:43,769 ... there's nothing we can do about it. 484 00:39:45,244 --> 00:39:47,679 Have you removed all your jewelry? 485 00:39:49,282 --> 00:39:51,682 -Are you allergic to shellfish? -Jeebs! 486 00:39:51,851 --> 00:39:54,650 Right, then! Smoke 'em if you got 'em. 487 00:40:01,195 --> 00:40:02,628 Have you used this? 488 00:40:02,829 --> 00:40:06,595 I used it to make some hot-air popcorn. That's about it. 489 00:40:06,766 --> 00:40:09,702 Okay! Let's make it happen, cap'n! 490 00:41:04,891 --> 00:41:06,324 Perfect. 491 00:41:20,007 --> 00:41:22,066 -You're back. -No. 492 00:41:22,242 --> 00:41:25,438 -How'd you know his head grows back? -lt grows back? 493 00:41:27,947 --> 00:41:31,849 Real nice. Okay, that's the last time I help out a friend. 494 00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:36,811 -Kay, you remember anything? -Goodbye. 495 00:41:36,990 --> 00:41:38,548 -Kay! -Kay, wait! 496 00:41:39,392 --> 00:41:42,920 I never got the updated software. Still working off the 6.0. 497 00:41:43,095 --> 00:41:45,030 Your brain needs to reboot. 498 00:41:46,266 --> 00:41:47,597 Give it a minute. 499 00:41:47,767 --> 00:41:49,166 Kay! 500 00:41:49,436 --> 00:41:52,706 Bottom of my heart, I'm really sorry. I hope it won't affect our friendship. 501 00:41:52,706 --> 00:41:54,697 Bottom of my heart, I'm really sorry. I hope it won't affect our friendship. 502 00:41:54,874 --> 00:41:59,403 All those years of loyalty and trust, respect for one another. 503 00:42:01,849 --> 00:42:03,146 Right over there! 504 00:42:04,684 --> 00:42:07,153 -Where's Kay? -He's not here! He went-- 505 00:42:07,353 --> 00:42:10,686 Kay's retired. I'm his trigger-happy replacement. 506 00:42:10,858 --> 00:42:14,418 Right in the pie hole. Now nothing's gonna taste right. 507 00:42:14,595 --> 00:42:17,063 -Lower your weapon. -No. 508 00:42:22,568 --> 00:42:25,094 Jay, how are you, boo-boo? 509 00:42:25,271 --> 00:42:27,934 -These guys really need Kay. -He's a neutral. 510 00:42:28,108 --> 00:42:31,771 -Tell me something we don't know. -Yeah, tell me something-- 511 00:42:31,945 --> 00:42:33,537 I am so sorry. 512 00:42:33,713 --> 00:42:35,704 -God bless you. -Thank you. 513 00:42:36,983 --> 00:42:41,010 If I don't bring Kay back to MiB, Serleena's gonna kick my ass. 514 00:42:41,188 --> 00:42:43,246 -Now, where is he? -Where is who? 515 00:42:43,423 --> 00:42:45,983 You don't look too good. 516 00:42:46,726 --> 00:42:48,592 Yeah, and you look like crap. 517 00:42:51,398 --> 00:42:54,264 I take that back. He look like crap. 518 00:42:56,869 --> 00:42:58,769 -Bend him! -Bend him. 519 00:42:58,938 --> 00:43:00,804 Wait, don't bend him. 520 00:43:38,579 --> 00:43:40,376 Damn decent of you. 521 00:43:40,947 --> 00:43:42,244 Don't mention it. 522 00:44:03,103 --> 00:44:05,900 -I'm gonna be sick. -You don't wanna do that. 523 00:44:06,072 --> 00:44:10,099 -Fellas, I think he's telling the truth. -Then he's no good to us. 524 00:44:12,445 --> 00:44:15,438 -Didn't I teach you anything, kid? -Pineal eye! 525 00:44:18,017 --> 00:44:19,713 Go for the mosh tendrils! 526 00:44:23,789 --> 00:44:25,791 Kay, he's a ball-chinnian. 527 00:44:30,197 --> 00:44:32,722 -You were in a tight spot. -I handled it. 528 00:44:32,898 --> 00:44:35,697 -You need a partner. -I had one. Job got too tough. 529 00:44:35,869 --> 00:44:38,200 I'm back. You got some dust on your coat. 530 00:44:38,371 --> 00:44:40,237 So you got your memory back. 531 00:44:40,407 --> 00:44:42,874 -What the hell is going on? -Don't know. 532 00:44:43,043 --> 00:44:45,510 -The Light of Zartha? -Never heard of it. 533 00:44:45,679 --> 00:44:46,702 Cool. 534 00:44:50,050 --> 00:44:52,382 You don't remember the Light of Zartha? 535 00:44:52,552 --> 00:44:55,248 Must've neuralyzed myself to keep it from myself. 536 00:44:55,421 --> 00:44:58,686 -Good plan. What you doing? -I do the driving. 537 00:44:58,858 --> 00:45:00,849 -Wait, no. Whoa. -I remember that. 538 00:45:01,028 --> 00:45:04,963 What you remember is you used to drive that old, busted jawn. 539 00:45:05,132 --> 00:45:08,191 I drive the new hotness. 540 00:45:08,367 --> 00:45:11,996 Old and busted, new hotness. 541 00:45:20,947 --> 00:45:23,039 Old busted hotness. 542 00:45:23,416 --> 00:45:26,112 -Serleena, please. -Been a long time, Zed. 543 00:45:26,286 --> 00:45:29,914 I'm just touched you remembered me. Makes me fuzzy all over. 544 00:45:30,090 --> 00:45:33,423 Never forget a pretty whatever you are. 545 00:45:35,662 --> 00:45:37,356 Zed? 546 00:45:37,731 --> 00:45:39,391 Zed? Look at you. 547 00:45:39,566 --> 00:45:42,557 Twenty-five years, and you're still such a looker. 548 00:45:42,735 --> 00:45:44,465 Cut out the meat and dairy. 549 00:45:44,637 --> 00:45:48,438 And you, still a pile of squirmy crap in a different wrapper. 550 00:45:48,775 --> 00:45:52,438 So feisty. Look, we both need the same thing. 551 00:45:55,347 --> 00:45:56,871 Bring him in. 552 00:45:57,550 --> 00:45:58,642 Don't think so. 553 00:45:58,818 --> 00:46:02,778 What about the Light's secret? If it's not off Earth by midnight... 554 00:46:02,956 --> 00:46:06,391 ... it self-destructs, annihilating your little planet. 555 00:46:06,559 --> 00:46:10,427 I lose, you lose. I win, everything keeps spinning. 556 00:46:10,831 --> 00:46:14,789 You don't want the Light on Earth any more than I do. 557 00:46:17,403 --> 00:46:19,099 All right, Serleena. 558 00:46:20,373 --> 00:46:22,237 You win. 559 00:46:23,844 --> 00:46:27,177 Zed? Is that you? I could be Agent Em. 560 00:46:27,546 --> 00:46:28,979 Zed. Hello? 561 00:46:39,492 --> 00:46:41,552 So feisty. 562 00:46:46,032 --> 00:46:49,695 Fastest way back to MiB, you take this right on 39th. 563 00:46:49,869 --> 00:46:51,427 Right here. Right. 564 00:46:53,606 --> 00:46:55,369 Next right on 37th. 565 00:46:55,541 --> 00:46:58,010 Right here. Right! 566 00:46:58,345 --> 00:46:59,903 We're not going back. 567 00:47:00,079 --> 00:47:05,142 Headquarters has been breached, man. We need to peel caps and split wigs. 568 00:47:05,318 --> 00:47:06,945 Not ready. 569 00:47:07,387 --> 00:47:10,845 Look, you've been out for five years. That's a long time. 570 00:47:11,023 --> 00:47:14,117 I understand you're scared. I'm a little scared too. 571 00:47:14,293 --> 00:47:16,353 -I'm not scared. -Me neither. 572 00:47:16,929 --> 00:47:19,329 I just thought we was bonding. 573 00:47:20,166 --> 00:47:24,262 You're acting like a rookie. Splitting wigs and stepping on caps. 574 00:47:24,436 --> 00:47:28,532 -No wonder Zed brought me back. -He did it because you messed up. 575 00:47:28,708 --> 00:47:31,403 Your attitude makes for a stressful environment. 576 00:47:31,577 --> 00:47:35,639 Tell it to the hand. Stressful is what we got back at MiB. 577 00:47:35,816 --> 00:47:40,412 Exactly. Serleena broke into MiB in order to lure me back. 578 00:47:40,586 --> 00:47:42,646 Into a trap. 579 00:47:42,822 --> 00:47:45,382 Which is why we can't bust in there. 580 00:47:45,559 --> 00:47:48,550 We need a plan. Where we going? Scene of the crime? 581 00:47:48,728 --> 00:47:52,925 -You're the boss. -Scene of the crime. That's a left. 582 00:47:55,402 --> 00:47:57,869 I'll contact the witness. We'll talk to her. 583 00:47:58,037 --> 00:48:01,302 Things have changed. We used to neuralyze witnesses. 584 00:48:02,641 --> 00:48:04,371 See, originally, I'd-- 585 00:48:05,378 --> 00:48:09,871 No, I was going to-- I interrogated her. 586 00:48:10,050 --> 00:48:11,083 -Then neuralyzed her? -What? 587 00:48:11,083 --> 00:48:11,708 -Then neuralyzed her? -What? 588 00:48:11,885 --> 00:48:17,289 MiB code 773ll-1 clearly states that all civilian personnel-- 589 00:48:18,291 --> 00:48:19,780 -Drop that weapon! -No! 590 00:48:19,960 --> 00:48:21,552 Jay, I'm--I'm sorry. 591 00:48:21,728 --> 00:48:24,662 No, no, I'm fine. It's my fault. 592 00:48:24,998 --> 00:48:27,465 Kay, my partner. Laura, the witness. 593 00:48:27,633 --> 00:48:28,760 Pleasure. 594 00:48:30,036 --> 00:48:34,632 Thanks for sending those agents over to keep an eye on me last night. 595 00:48:34,807 --> 00:48:36,798 MiB procedural code 594-B... 596 00:48:36,976 --> 00:48:40,139 ... states that MiB personnel shall never be used-- 597 00:48:40,313 --> 00:48:45,648 Ben, the Zarthan, was vaporized here. I assume the perp was over here. 598 00:48:45,818 --> 00:48:47,376 Ben. 599 00:48:47,554 --> 00:48:50,387 -Was he 5'7", thinning hair? -You knew him? 600 00:48:50,824 --> 00:48:53,054 Nope. Never seen him before in my life. 601 00:48:53,226 --> 00:48:56,126 That is a hell of a fish. 602 00:48:58,331 --> 00:49:00,128 Wait a minute. 603 00:49:05,271 --> 00:49:06,670 You left yourself clues? 604 00:49:06,840 --> 00:49:10,900 In case I was deneuralyzed because my replacement couldn't handle it. 605 00:49:11,077 --> 00:49:15,740 If the joker that had got deneuralyzed hadn't created the situation-- 606 00:49:15,916 --> 00:49:17,246 Boys. 607 00:49:19,152 --> 00:49:22,052 All right. You pointing at something. 608 00:49:26,226 --> 00:49:27,590 Excuse me. 609 00:49:29,128 --> 00:49:30,720 The astronaut. 610 00:49:32,331 --> 00:49:33,492 Jay? 611 00:49:33,967 --> 00:49:36,264 Okay, all right. He's pointing... . 612 00:49:36,436 --> 00:49:38,403 He's like... . 613 00:49:41,173 --> 00:49:42,970 Who would stack boxes like this? 614 00:49:43,142 --> 00:49:46,976 A box stacker who's not stacking boxes. He's leaving clues. 615 00:49:47,146 --> 00:49:48,637 It's an arrow. 616 00:49:52,786 --> 00:49:55,050 -Jay? -You're slowing me down, slick. 617 00:49:55,220 --> 00:49:58,849 Whatever we're looking for is in these cabinets, right here. 618 00:50:00,260 --> 00:50:03,320 Anchovy filets in virgin olive oil. 619 00:50:06,865 --> 00:50:09,231 I hope I'm not slowing you down. 620 00:50:09,836 --> 00:50:12,463 Good work, partner. Yeah. 621 00:50:12,639 --> 00:50:15,574 -We gotta figure out where it goes. -I know where. 622 00:50:15,874 --> 00:50:20,005 -No. Not yet. -MiB code 773 clearly says-- 623 00:50:20,179 --> 00:50:23,376 I know the code, but she might be important to me. 624 00:50:23,983 --> 00:50:26,474 To us. Well, for help. To help us later. 625 00:50:27,153 --> 00:50:29,849 Well, she can't stay here. They'll be back. 626 00:50:32,559 --> 00:50:36,255 -You can stay with friends of mine. -People like you? 627 00:50:36,563 --> 00:50:37,552 Kind of. 628 00:50:37,731 --> 00:50:39,289 Jay! 629 00:50:39,465 --> 00:50:41,956 -Low bridge! -What's going on, man? 630 00:50:42,135 --> 00:50:45,400 Hey, what's happening, fellas? MiB is code 101. 631 00:50:46,005 --> 00:50:47,371 -Bad. -Very bad. 632 00:50:47,539 --> 00:50:51,601 -I need your help. This is Laura. -Laura! 633 00:50:51,778 --> 00:50:53,438 Easy, easy! 634 00:50:53,612 --> 00:50:54,601 They're worms. 635 00:50:54,780 --> 00:50:58,079 Once you go worm, that's what you'll yearn. 636 00:50:58,251 --> 00:51:01,583 -That's what they say. They just: -I've dated worse. 637 00:51:02,121 --> 00:51:04,715 They're suspended for stealing from duty-free. 638 00:51:04,891 --> 00:51:07,688 -We were framed. -Zed's wormophobic. 639 00:51:07,860 --> 00:51:09,157 -Kay! -You're back! 640 00:51:09,329 --> 00:51:12,059 -They said you were dead. -We're double-parked. 641 00:51:12,231 --> 00:51:14,132 Laura's very important to me. 642 00:51:14,833 --> 00:51:18,429 To us. To the stuff-- Me and you, the stuff we're doing. 643 00:51:19,572 --> 00:51:22,563 -Keep an eye on her. -I'll keep both on her. 644 00:51:22,742 --> 00:51:23,731 No problem! 645 00:51:25,978 --> 00:51:28,742 -Why don't you sit here? -Like you got a shot. 646 00:51:28,914 --> 00:51:30,074 Hey, shut up! 647 00:51:33,253 --> 00:51:35,949 My communicator, in case you need it. 648 00:51:39,592 --> 00:51:41,219 -Nice move. -Okay. 649 00:51:43,862 --> 00:51:47,662 -Just watch out for Neeble. -Which one's Neeble? 650 00:51:50,103 --> 00:51:52,333 -Which one of y'all is Neeble? -Yo, mama! 651 00:51:52,505 --> 00:51:56,702 Him, right there. It's fine. Everything's straight. It's safe. 652 00:51:56,876 --> 00:51:58,867 Don't fall asleep. 653 00:52:00,612 --> 00:52:02,273 Twister! 654 00:52:04,284 --> 00:52:08,947 Run over your plan one more time. I'm struggling with it. 655 00:52:09,121 --> 00:52:13,023 You neuralyzed memory of the Light but left yourself clues. 656 00:52:13,193 --> 00:52:14,182 Right. 657 00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:19,423 Photo pointing to a key in a pizzeria which opens a locker at Grand Central. 658 00:52:19,599 --> 00:52:23,659 -ln the locker, we'll find another clue. -That's the plan. 659 00:52:26,106 --> 00:52:29,700 -I like to keep my enemies confused. -We're all confused. 660 00:52:31,978 --> 00:52:36,311 -Are you gonna slow me down? -Your brain's working on old software. 661 00:52:36,483 --> 00:52:38,713 Why don't you go grab us some coffee? 662 00:52:38,885 --> 00:52:42,376 Sure. How do you take it? Black? Couple cubes of kiss my ass? 663 00:52:42,554 --> 00:52:45,956 I don't know what's in there, so step back. 664 00:52:46,126 --> 00:52:49,583 Kay, for real, man. Open the damn locker. 665 00:52:54,166 --> 00:52:56,566 Kay! He's back! The light giver! 666 00:52:56,735 --> 00:52:59,226 All hail Kay! All hail Kay! 667 00:52:59,606 --> 00:53:03,474 Oh, Kay, can you see By the dawn's early light 668 00:53:03,642 --> 00:53:06,510 You are the man who would be king of the train locker. 669 00:53:06,679 --> 00:53:07,668 Praise Kay! 670 00:53:07,847 --> 00:53:12,648 Oh, good and gentle townsfolk of Locker C-18... 671 00:53:12,818 --> 00:53:16,380 -... did I leave anything here? -Yes. The timekeeper. 672 00:53:16,556 --> 00:53:19,217 Left to illuminate our streets and hearts. 673 00:53:19,391 --> 00:53:23,851 -I've been looking everywhere for this. -Merciful one! The clock tower! 674 00:53:24,030 --> 00:53:26,760 I got y'all, it's cool. Check this out. 675 00:53:27,032 --> 00:53:30,161 Titanium case. Waterproof to over 300 meters. 676 00:53:30,936 --> 00:53:33,496 -That's banging. -Who are you, stranger? 677 00:53:33,940 --> 00:53:35,532 Jay. 678 00:53:35,974 --> 00:53:38,170 All hail Jay! All hail Jay! 679 00:53:38,610 --> 00:53:40,635 Oh, Jay, can you see 680 00:53:40,813 --> 00:53:43,873 -Oh, merciful Jay, the keeper of-- -Come on. 681 00:53:44,416 --> 00:53:46,577 -Wait! The commandments! -The tablet! 682 00:53:46,753 --> 00:53:49,778 The tablet! The tablet! The tablet! The tablet! 683 00:53:49,956 --> 00:53:53,983 We have lived by its word, and peace has reigned throughout our world. 684 00:53:54,159 --> 00:53:57,561 Pass it on to others! So that they too may be enlightened! 685 00:53:57,729 --> 00:53:59,391 Be kind! Rewind! 686 00:53:59,566 --> 00:54:01,396 Reconcile your past... 687 00:54:01,833 --> 00:54:04,233 ... in order to move into your future! 688 00:54:04,403 --> 00:54:06,769 Two for one every Wednesday. 689 00:54:06,940 --> 00:54:10,307 Give twice as much as ye receive on our most sacred of days. 690 00:54:10,577 --> 00:54:11,635 Every Wednesday. 691 00:54:11,811 --> 00:54:15,610 Large adult entertainment section in the back. 692 00:54:19,017 --> 00:54:20,575 That's just nasty. 693 00:54:21,420 --> 00:54:23,684 -What's with the video card? -Don't know. 694 00:54:23,856 --> 00:54:25,345 -The watch? -A reminder. 695 00:54:25,525 --> 00:54:26,923 -Of what? -Can't remember. 696 00:54:27,092 --> 00:54:28,081 Guess. 697 00:54:28,260 --> 00:54:32,027 I guess we have till midnight. 59 minutes to figure it out. 698 00:54:34,434 --> 00:54:38,563 Look. Here's an idea. Let's stop chasing butt-backwards clues... 699 00:54:38,737 --> 00:54:42,902 ... get a couple fission carbonizers and get our headquarters back. 700 00:54:43,075 --> 00:54:45,237 It's all about to make sense, kid. 701 00:54:45,411 --> 00:54:47,173 Is this card valid? 702 00:54:48,815 --> 00:54:52,648 -This card hasn't been used in years. -I've been away on business. 703 00:54:52,818 --> 00:54:55,150 -Billions of frequent flier miles. -Try and use them. 704 00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:59,347 I wanted to go to Cambodia. You can get a lobster dinner for a dollar. 705 00:54:59,726 --> 00:55:05,061 The airlines black out holidays. It's a conspiracy, I'm sure, I mean-- 706 00:55:05,231 --> 00:55:07,927 Can you tell us anything about the account? 707 00:55:08,333 --> 00:55:10,267 You never checked out a tape. 708 00:55:10,436 --> 00:55:13,769 You reserved one once, but you never picked it up. 709 00:55:14,307 --> 00:55:16,740 -Newton. -There's a rat in the toilet. 710 00:55:16,909 --> 00:55:21,175 It's all stopped up. You're gonna have to pee in the sin-- 711 00:55:24,383 --> 00:55:27,353 -Still think I'm paranoid? -Yeah. 712 00:55:28,121 --> 00:55:33,581 Gentlemen, my name is Newton. I run the place. Seen any aliens lately? 713 00:55:33,760 --> 00:55:37,992 -You need professional help. -He's getting it. It's not working. 714 00:55:38,164 --> 00:55:40,394 Okay, so, new case, huh? 715 00:55:40,566 --> 00:55:42,999 Episode 27, Light of Zartha. 716 00:55:44,537 --> 00:55:45,833 Got it. 717 00:55:46,472 --> 00:55:50,237 Jarra, it's a sin they've kept a genius like you locked away. 718 00:55:50,409 --> 00:55:54,369 Their agent Jay caught me siphoning ozone to sell on the black market. 719 00:55:54,546 --> 00:55:56,481 They're touchy about global warming. 720 00:55:56,648 --> 00:56:00,210 I need a spacecraft that can travel 300 times the speed of light. 721 00:56:00,385 --> 00:56:02,353 I'll give you whatever you want. 722 00:56:02,521 --> 00:56:05,046 -Give me Jay. We'll call it even. -Groovy. 723 00:56:05,824 --> 00:56:08,293 You've got till midnight. 724 00:56:12,465 --> 00:56:16,059 Gatbot, I got a little something special for you. 725 00:56:20,539 --> 00:56:23,338 Newton? Newton, is that you? 726 00:56:23,508 --> 00:56:25,999 Yes, Mom, I'm up here with some friends. 727 00:56:26,179 --> 00:56:27,771 I wanna have your baby. 728 00:56:27,947 --> 00:56:30,039 Would you like some mini-pizza? 729 00:56:30,983 --> 00:56:34,077 You guys want some mini-pizzas? They're good. 730 00:56:34,253 --> 00:56:37,449 They're like mini-bagels, with pizza stuff on them. 731 00:56:37,623 --> 00:56:40,420 She'll put a little fontina cheese on. 732 00:56:40,592 --> 00:56:44,552 She has palsy, so she ends up putting a lot of cheese on. 733 00:56:49,202 --> 00:56:51,329 No, thanks, we're cool. 734 00:56:51,503 --> 00:56:52,766 All right. 735 00:56:54,507 --> 00:56:55,871 Over here. 736 00:57:00,545 --> 00:57:01,876 This is it. 737 00:57:02,181 --> 00:57:04,478 Finally some hard evidence. 738 00:57:04,717 --> 00:57:08,414 Gentlemen, before I play the tape, one question: 739 00:57:09,021 --> 00:57:10,784 What's up with anal probing? 740 00:57:10,956 --> 00:57:14,858 Aliens travel billions of light years just to check out our-- 741 00:57:15,027 --> 00:57:17,291 Boy, move. 742 00:57:17,463 --> 00:57:20,363 Okay. Just a question. 743 00:57:21,400 --> 00:57:24,961 Here is one of their stories that "never happened"... 744 00:57:25,137 --> 00:57:29,005 ... from one of their files that doesn't exist. 745 00:57:30,409 --> 00:57:35,403 1978. Devastating war of Zartha had raged on for 50 years. 746 00:57:35,581 --> 00:57:37,344 Looks like Spielberg's work. 747 00:57:37,516 --> 00:57:41,418 But the Zarthans had a great treasure, the Light of Zartha. 748 00:57:41,586 --> 00:57:44,954 A source of power so awesome, it alone... 749 00:57:45,124 --> 00:57:48,719 ... could mean victory and restoration for the Zarthans... 750 00:57:48,894 --> 00:57:53,331 ... or complete annihilation, if it fell into the hands of the Kylothians. 751 00:57:53,499 --> 00:57:57,595 A group of Zarthans made the journey, led by the Keeper of the Light... 752 00:57:57,769 --> 00:57:59,237 Lauranna. 753 00:57:59,671 --> 00:58:01,764 ... Princess Lauranna. 754 00:58:02,074 --> 00:58:06,635 Lauranna beseeched the Men in Black to help her hide the Light on Earth. 755 00:58:06,813 --> 00:58:09,179 But they could not intervene. 756 00:58:09,347 --> 00:58:10,575 No. 757 00:58:11,284 --> 00:58:12,409 It was night. 758 00:58:14,619 --> 00:58:16,052 And it was raining. 759 00:58:16,722 --> 00:58:18,121 You've been very wise. 760 00:58:18,291 --> 00:58:22,853 Kay, please. If Serleena takes the Light, it's the end of our world. 761 00:58:23,496 --> 00:58:26,829 If we extend protection for the Light beyond Earth... 762 00:58:26,999 --> 00:58:30,331 ... we put Earth in jeopardy. We must remain neutral. 763 00:58:30,536 --> 00:58:33,095 -Where is it? -We're neutral, remember? 764 00:58:33,306 --> 00:58:35,501 If you want it, go get it. 765 00:58:39,744 --> 00:58:41,235 No! 766 00:59:10,376 --> 00:59:12,673 And so never knowing it happened... 767 00:59:12,845 --> 00:59:15,780 ... the people of Earth were once again saved... 768 00:59:15,947 --> 00:59:19,075 ... by a secret society of protectors-- 769 00:59:20,186 --> 00:59:21,847 I shouldn't have. 770 00:59:22,822 --> 00:59:25,255 You never sent it off the planet. 771 00:59:26,358 --> 00:59:27,791 You hid it here. 772 00:59:29,795 --> 00:59:31,193 The worm guys. 773 00:59:35,367 --> 00:59:38,166 Are you one of Newton's friends from therapy? 774 00:59:38,336 --> 00:59:42,831 -Yes, ma'am, I am. Look here, please. -Would you like some mini-pizz--? 775 00:59:43,842 --> 00:59:45,470 A neuralyz-- 776 00:59:46,512 --> 00:59:50,072 Okay, first, get some contact lenses. 777 00:59:50,249 --> 00:59:52,546 Joints look like they pick up cable. 778 00:59:52,717 --> 00:59:57,313 Second, take her to Cambodia. Get her lobster. Pay more than a dollar. 779 00:59:57,490 --> 01:00:00,789 Third, the second y'all get back from Cambodia... 780 01:00:00,960 --> 01:00:03,985 ... move your bum ass out of your mom's house. 781 01:00:04,162 --> 01:00:06,563 -Let's go. -Boy, you like 40 years old. 782 01:00:06,731 --> 01:00:09,030 -Agent Jay? -All right, all right. 783 01:00:09,200 --> 01:00:13,193 And there ain't no such thing as aliens or Men in Black. 784 01:00:19,412 --> 01:00:22,608 -You wanna go to Cambodia? -Yeah. 785 01:00:24,749 --> 01:00:26,148 Hey, Mom? 786 01:00:26,751 --> 01:00:28,845 Communicator, Jay. 787 01:00:29,722 --> 01:00:32,519 -Laura, it's me. -Jay, we're playing Twister. 788 01:00:32,691 --> 01:00:34,488 What's up, Jay? 789 01:00:34,659 --> 01:00:37,925 -Quit touching my butt! -I thought it was your face. 790 01:00:38,097 --> 01:00:41,123 They're good at this. They don't have spines. 791 01:00:41,300 --> 01:00:44,269 They were telling me about Oprah, from Chicago. 792 01:00:44,436 --> 01:00:47,668 Maybe landed in Chicago. 793 01:00:48,307 --> 01:00:50,831 -Are you wearing a bracelet? -Yeah. 794 01:00:51,010 --> 01:00:52,068 Is it glowing? 795 01:00:57,182 --> 01:01:00,175 -lt's never done that before. -We're on our way. 796 01:01:00,353 --> 01:01:01,876 Communicator, Frank. 797 01:01:02,188 --> 01:01:07,717 Deactivate the lockdown. We're headed to the worm guys. We found the Light. 798 01:01:07,892 --> 01:01:10,623 Got it, Jay. Scrad? 799 01:01:10,795 --> 01:01:11,921 Bitch. 800 01:01:12,097 --> 01:01:13,998 Why didn't you say I love you? 801 01:01:14,166 --> 01:01:18,795 -He's a dog. I don't even like him. -No, the girl. You're sweet on her. 802 01:01:18,970 --> 01:01:22,133 That's why you didn't neuralyze her. You got emotionally involved. 803 01:01:22,307 --> 01:01:26,802 -Like you did with Lauranna? -I put the entire planet in danger. 804 01:01:26,978 --> 01:01:30,244 I don't want to see you making my mistakes. 805 01:01:30,416 --> 01:01:31,974 Whatever, man. 806 01:01:36,354 --> 01:01:37,583 Laura? 807 01:01:44,563 --> 01:01:45,586 Damn! 808 01:01:50,001 --> 01:01:51,970 Never stood half a chance. 809 01:01:53,204 --> 01:01:54,296 Oh, boy. 810 01:01:55,407 --> 01:01:57,467 That's gonna leave a scar. 811 01:01:58,844 --> 01:02:00,675 -Where's Laura? -MiB headquarters. 812 01:02:00,845 --> 01:02:03,974 -Some dumb two-headed guy. -They got the bracelet. 813 01:02:04,150 --> 01:02:06,914 We got 39 minutes. You guys... 814 01:02:07,086 --> 01:02:09,246 ... pull yourselves together. 815 01:02:09,988 --> 01:02:11,046 Damn. 816 01:02:12,458 --> 01:02:14,516 That's feeling better. 817 01:02:14,693 --> 01:02:17,423 -Hey, guys, wait up! -Let me grab my drink! 818 01:02:17,595 --> 01:02:19,621 Serleena has the bracelet. Why take Laura? 819 01:02:19,798 --> 01:02:20,958 She also wants me. 820 01:02:21,132 --> 01:02:24,432 -What's the book say? -We're off book. I say split some wigs. 821 01:02:24,603 --> 01:02:26,833 -We need wig-splitting weapons. -Got them. 822 01:02:32,378 --> 01:02:35,438 Paw Paw's coming to visit me. Hello, Paw Paw. 823 01:02:35,613 --> 01:02:38,606 Paw Paw and ZuZu love to see what's going on in the garden. 824 01:02:38,784 --> 01:02:42,353 Don't worry, folks. I used to live here. Came to pick up a few things. 825 01:02:42,353 --> 01:02:43,255 Don't worry, folks. I used to live here. Came to pick up a few things. 826 01:02:46,758 --> 01:02:47,358 Nice place. 827 01:02:47,358 --> 01:02:48,724 Nice place. 828 01:03:01,206 --> 01:03:02,469 See you. 829 01:03:12,284 --> 01:03:15,081 You did not see a room full of weapons or four aliens. 830 01:03:15,253 --> 01:03:17,983 You will cherish and love each other for the rest of your lives. 831 01:03:18,157 --> 01:03:22,115 Which could be the next 28 minutes, so get to loving and cherishing. 832 01:03:22,293 --> 01:03:24,956 And she can stay up as late as she want... 833 01:03:25,130 --> 01:03:27,758 ... and have cookies and candy and stuff. 834 01:03:38,644 --> 01:03:40,838 Four minutes to launch. 835 01:03:41,012 --> 01:03:42,947 Four minutes to launch. 836 01:03:43,648 --> 01:03:47,675 -Your ship is ready. -Good. Send it to Kyloth now. 837 01:03:51,056 --> 01:03:52,284 Ready, guys? 838 01:03:52,458 --> 01:03:54,653 Lock and load, baby. 839 01:03:54,827 --> 01:03:56,487 -You ready, kid? -Kid? 840 01:03:56,662 --> 01:03:59,688 I saved the world from a Kreelon invasion. 841 01:03:59,865 --> 01:04:04,028 They're the Backstreet Boys of the universe. They throw snowballs? 842 01:04:04,804 --> 01:04:06,271 Know what you're doing? 843 01:04:06,438 --> 01:04:09,429 I'm about to attack one of the most feared aliens... 844 01:04:09,608 --> 01:04:12,873 ... with four worms and a mailman. Let's make it hot. 845 01:04:13,045 --> 01:04:14,307 No, no, wait! 846 01:04:20,085 --> 01:04:22,382 A code 101 lockdown! 847 01:04:22,554 --> 01:04:26,581 The building gets pressurized. Nothing in, nothing out. I knew that. 848 01:04:26,758 --> 01:04:28,784 Yeah, you knew. Front and center, worms! 849 01:04:28,961 --> 01:04:30,257 You got it. 850 01:04:36,902 --> 01:04:42,396 It's about time you guys got here. That lady is causing all kinds of hell. 851 01:05:02,728 --> 01:05:05,992 Yummy. Someone I need to eat. 852 01:05:06,197 --> 01:05:10,133 Get to the launch pad. The bracelet shows the departure point. 853 01:05:10,302 --> 01:05:12,293 -Do not come back for me. -What? 854 01:05:12,470 --> 01:05:15,166 Do not come back for me. 855 01:05:19,411 --> 01:05:23,507 -Worm guys, give me some cover fire. -Too scared, can't move. 856 01:05:33,191 --> 01:05:34,385 Go! 857 01:05:45,103 --> 01:05:48,039 -Limber. -Go to subcontrol panel 7-R-Delta. 858 01:05:48,206 --> 01:05:53,702 -Shut off power so they can't take off. -Can't. Too scared. 859 01:05:54,679 --> 01:05:57,273 -That way. -Away from the bullets. 860 01:05:57,449 --> 01:05:59,075 No problem. 861 01:06:13,731 --> 01:06:15,632 Nice to see you again, Kay. 862 01:06:19,905 --> 01:06:21,929 -Three minutes to launch. -Jay! 863 01:06:22,106 --> 01:06:24,302 Three minutes to launch. 864 01:06:24,809 --> 01:06:26,277 Hello, Jay. Long time. 865 01:06:26,445 --> 01:06:28,936 Jarra! What's up, man? You look great. 866 01:06:29,113 --> 01:06:31,742 -What's it been? Five years? -And 42 days. 867 01:06:31,916 --> 01:06:34,249 You count every one when you're locked away. 868 01:06:34,286 --> 01:06:38,490 You shouldn't have tried to steal our ozone. Be there in one minute. 869 01:06:39,791 --> 01:06:42,385 Over our dead titanium bodies! 870 01:06:42,561 --> 01:06:44,028 Two minutes. 871 01:06:50,668 --> 01:06:52,499 Let's play this one by ear. 872 01:06:55,307 --> 01:06:59,539 -I should have vaporized you before. -You really did love Lauranna. 873 01:06:59,711 --> 01:07:01,577 Didn't you, Kay? 874 01:07:01,880 --> 01:07:03,905 You silly little man. 875 01:07:32,144 --> 01:07:34,202 Two minutes to launch. 876 01:07:36,148 --> 01:07:37,581 Just go, I'll be fine! 877 01:07:38,383 --> 01:07:40,874 What you talking about? I'm winning. 878 01:07:41,052 --> 01:07:45,079 Jarra, you are under arrest for being that ugly... 879 01:07:45,257 --> 01:07:48,054 ... and for making that many copies. Surrender! 880 01:07:48,260 --> 01:07:50,124 I want him in pieces. 881 01:07:52,798 --> 01:07:55,130 Jarra Jr. is going, going... 882 01:07:55,800 --> 01:07:57,597 ... gone! 883 01:08:10,249 --> 01:08:12,842 -Rectum. -Damn near killed him! 884 01:08:13,017 --> 01:08:14,780 Never get tired of that one. 885 01:08:14,953 --> 01:08:17,581 -Where do we shut off the power? -Don't know. 886 01:08:23,628 --> 01:08:27,530 -I'm fine. I'll be there in a minute. -No, he won't. 887 01:08:33,639 --> 01:08:35,868 Down to one now, Jarra! 888 01:08:45,350 --> 01:08:47,716 Thirty seconds to launch. 889 01:08:55,828 --> 01:08:58,194 Fifteen seconds to launch. 890 01:09:01,100 --> 01:09:03,226 Ten seconds to launch. 891 01:09:03,534 --> 01:09:04,762 Eight. 892 01:09:04,936 --> 01:09:06,267 Seven. 893 01:09:06,438 --> 01:09:07,802 Six. 894 01:09:07,972 --> 01:09:09,304 Five. 895 01:09:09,475 --> 01:09:10,600 Four. 896 01:09:10,775 --> 01:09:11,902 Three. 897 01:09:12,077 --> 01:09:13,168 Two. 898 01:09:14,680 --> 01:09:16,614 Launch terminated. 899 01:09:17,082 --> 01:09:20,539 -What did you mean, leave you? -Well, he took your gun. 900 01:09:20,719 --> 01:09:23,551 Cracked your head. Slammed you across the room. 901 01:09:23,721 --> 01:09:27,783 -Half the time you were on your back. -Look, that's how I fight. 902 01:09:28,493 --> 01:09:30,962 You've lost, you insignificant speck. 903 01:09:31,130 --> 01:09:34,189 You've wasted 25 years of my time, and for what? 904 01:09:34,432 --> 01:09:38,460 The total annihilation of Zartha. All because you went mushy. 905 01:09:38,636 --> 01:09:42,868 I'll give you one last chance to surrender, you slimy invertebrate. 906 01:09:43,041 --> 01:09:46,601 -What are you gonna do to stop me? -Not me. Him. 907 01:09:48,646 --> 01:09:50,944 Your flight's been canceled. 908 01:09:57,655 --> 01:10:02,092 Shut down power. Shut down power. Buttons, buttons. I'm guessing... . 909 01:10:02,261 --> 01:10:03,386 Yeah. 910 01:10:05,463 --> 01:10:07,728 -Worms! -Sorry. 911 01:10:12,804 --> 01:10:15,466 -Give me the bracelet. -I'm going with you. 912 01:10:15,640 --> 01:10:18,337 Everybody in the car. Everybody. 913 01:10:31,523 --> 01:10:34,390 This bracelet is what everybody's been after? 914 01:10:34,560 --> 01:10:36,288 It's often something small. 915 01:10:36,461 --> 01:10:40,123 It's not the Light. It tells us the departure point. 916 01:10:40,298 --> 01:10:42,493 If we don't get there in 11 minutes... 917 01:10:42,667 --> 01:10:45,728 ... that bracelet will go nuclear and destroy Earth. 918 01:10:45,904 --> 01:10:47,371 What?! 919 01:10:48,006 --> 01:10:48,994 Hello. 920 01:10:50,007 --> 01:10:51,565 -Wait. -I know what I'm doing. 921 01:11:07,024 --> 01:11:08,014 Damn. 922 01:11:09,728 --> 01:11:12,925 -Modified to hyper-speed! -Seat belts. 923 01:11:16,335 --> 01:11:17,359 What's that? 924 01:11:17,536 --> 01:11:20,936 At hyper-speed, you have to use the navigational stalk. 925 01:11:25,210 --> 01:11:30,273 Toggle switches for the ailerons. Joysticks for the stabilizer and rudder. 926 01:11:34,685 --> 01:11:36,516 I just want you to know-- 927 01:11:36,688 --> 01:11:38,814 Hold on to that for one second. 928 01:11:42,394 --> 01:11:44,055 Computer, worms. 929 01:11:44,229 --> 01:11:49,222 I said, "Bitch, if you don't want me to kick your skinny Zone Diet ass... 930 01:11:49,400 --> 01:11:53,269 -... turn around and exit the planet. " -Frank, where are you? 931 01:11:53,438 --> 01:11:54,904 Main hall, egg display. 932 01:11:55,073 --> 01:11:57,939 We're taking fire. Kay pushed the red button. 933 01:11:58,109 --> 01:12:02,011 Computer at MiB can destroy bogey. I'll walk you through it. 934 01:12:04,248 --> 01:12:08,913 Jay? Frank. You were the best darn partner a Remoolian could ever have. 935 01:12:09,721 --> 01:12:10,983 Godspeed. 936 01:12:12,457 --> 01:12:13,480 Frank? Frank? 937 01:12:14,493 --> 01:12:17,154 Okay, here we go, automatic pilot. 938 01:12:19,430 --> 01:12:23,595 -lt is not automatic piloting. -He doesn't operate at hyper-speed. 939 01:12:23,769 --> 01:12:27,170 -I could use a steering wheel! -This is what we got. 940 01:12:28,974 --> 01:12:31,908 -Didn't you ever have a Game Boy? -What's that? 941 01:12:32,077 --> 01:12:33,600 You know what? Move. 942 01:12:34,945 --> 01:12:37,278 That is not the navigational stalk! 943 01:12:49,261 --> 01:12:51,252 Okay, straight down. 944 01:12:55,966 --> 01:12:57,365 Idiots. 945 01:13:07,445 --> 01:13:10,243 Subway may not be the best place to lose her. 946 01:13:12,617 --> 01:13:14,083 -Where is he? -He? 947 01:13:14,485 --> 01:13:15,783 Jeff. Hang on! 948 01:13:18,090 --> 01:13:19,078 Oops. 949 01:13:20,292 --> 01:13:21,417 Teeth. 950 01:13:55,359 --> 01:13:58,351 Running out of time, Kay. Where is the Light? 951 01:13:59,564 --> 01:14:01,054 Right here. 952 01:14:02,066 --> 01:14:04,297 -What? -What, I'm the Light? 953 01:14:05,203 --> 01:14:07,797 -No. No way. -You have a planet to save. 954 01:14:07,972 --> 01:14:10,440 You're mistaken. I work at a pizzeria. 955 01:14:10,609 --> 01:14:14,568 Two days ago, I was running a post office. You are who you are. 956 01:14:14,746 --> 01:14:17,840 Laura, you are the Light. 957 01:14:18,015 --> 01:14:21,747 The leader of your people. Their spirit and their hope. 958 01:14:21,920 --> 01:14:24,615 The power is within you to save a planet. 959 01:14:24,789 --> 01:14:29,726 I protected you until it was your time. Your time is now. 960 01:14:33,564 --> 01:14:37,331 You will save a world. You know things before they happen. 961 01:14:37,502 --> 01:14:39,595 -I'm a Libra. -You're Zarthan. 962 01:14:39,770 --> 01:14:44,002 -When you get sad, it rains. -Lots of people get sad when it rains. 963 01:14:44,309 --> 01:14:47,005 It rains because you're sad, baby. 964 01:15:40,231 --> 01:15:41,823 It's not fair. 965 01:15:47,739 --> 01:15:49,365 Never is. 966 01:15:51,141 --> 01:15:52,769 We are who we are... 967 01:15:52,944 --> 01:15:55,435 ... even if we sometimes forget. 968 01:16:04,855 --> 01:16:07,416 Jeff, I am so not in the mood for you! 969 01:16:07,591 --> 01:16:09,320 Get back in the subway! Now! 970 01:16:15,867 --> 01:16:17,128 That's not good. 971 01:16:19,003 --> 01:16:20,528 Wait! No! 972 01:16:21,972 --> 01:16:23,304 Jay! 973 01:16:23,908 --> 01:16:28,346 I cannot emphasize strongly enough how much we need you on that transport. 974 01:16:29,747 --> 01:16:32,046 Laura! You have to go! 975 01:16:32,484 --> 01:16:33,849 Oh, jeez. 976 01:16:35,886 --> 01:16:38,685 Go. He's fine. He does this all the time. 977 01:16:39,791 --> 01:16:41,019 Nope! 978 01:16:43,395 --> 01:16:46,296 About to lay the smackdown on your candy ass. 979 01:16:46,698 --> 01:16:49,029 Laura! It's your destiny! 980 01:16:49,266 --> 01:16:51,200 I was talking, Kay! 981 01:16:52,703 --> 01:16:54,864 Hey! No biting. 982 01:16:56,608 --> 01:16:59,007 If you don't go, we all die. 983 01:17:02,212 --> 01:17:04,773 You're just as beautiful as your mother. 984 01:17:11,489 --> 01:17:13,752 Kay? A little help? 985 01:17:26,136 --> 01:17:27,262 Kay? 986 01:17:29,106 --> 01:17:31,631 Might I suggest a bigger gun? 987 01:17:58,168 --> 01:17:59,761 -Kid? -Yeah. 988 01:18:00,238 --> 01:18:03,570 -Thanks for bringing me back. -No problem. 989 01:18:04,175 --> 01:18:05,698 Why didn't you tell me? 990 01:18:05,877 --> 01:18:07,970 Would you have let her go? 991 01:18:29,434 --> 01:18:33,301 So, what's it like on the outside? Not doing this every day? 992 01:18:33,471 --> 01:18:34,904 It's nice. 993 01:18:35,073 --> 01:18:38,872 Sleep late on the weekends. Watch the Weather Channel. 994 01:18:42,380 --> 01:18:44,506 I did miss this city. 995 01:18:45,749 --> 01:18:49,277 So Laura is Princess Lauranna's daughter. 996 01:18:51,189 --> 01:18:54,555 -Did y'all--? -MiB's a mess. Let's go, kid. 997 01:18:55,359 --> 01:18:56,587 Let's go? 998 01:18:56,761 --> 01:19:01,027 Thousands of people in New York and New Jersey saw our little event. 999 01:19:01,198 --> 01:19:05,568 Plan needs to be thought out. Plan needs to be cool. What you--? 1000 01:19:10,240 --> 01:19:12,208 Kid, I'll get you trained yet. 1001 01:19:12,377 --> 01:19:13,900 I want one of those. 1002 01:19:14,078 --> 01:19:15,341 Damn! 1003 01:19:20,185 --> 01:19:21,378 -Hey. -Hey. 1004 01:19:21,552 --> 01:19:23,987 -How you doing? -I'm good. 1005 01:19:24,154 --> 01:19:28,682 We've all been there. The girl is gone and it hurts. Wanna talk? 1006 01:19:28,859 --> 01:19:30,417 -No. -I can help. 1007 01:19:30,595 --> 01:19:31,583 No. 1008 01:19:31,762 --> 01:19:32,820 Still sulking? 1009 01:19:32,997 --> 01:19:33,985 -No. -Yeah. 1010 01:19:34,164 --> 01:19:38,396 You miss her. It happens to all of us. I knew this hot young thing. 1011 01:19:38,569 --> 01:19:42,164 When our bodies were in the positions of the Kamasutra-- 1012 01:19:42,340 --> 01:19:43,636 Zed! 1013 01:19:44,074 --> 01:19:45,939 Come on, man! Damn! 1014 01:19:46,344 --> 01:19:48,038 I'll tell you about dames. 1015 01:19:48,212 --> 01:19:51,774 They say they want to be scratched, but they really want: 1016 01:19:51,983 --> 01:19:53,609 Hey! Frank. 1017 01:19:53,818 --> 01:19:56,514 What? Still sitting shiva? Want my advice? 1018 01:19:56,688 --> 01:19:58,587 No. No advice. 1019 01:19:58,756 --> 01:20:00,314 No talking. 1020 01:20:00,925 --> 01:20:02,221 Hell, no. 1021 01:20:02,392 --> 01:20:05,055 Fellas, I swear, I'm fine. 1022 01:20:06,029 --> 01:20:08,828 All hail Jay! All hail Jay! 1023 01:20:09,367 --> 01:20:12,962 -I brought them from Grand Central. -Why put them in my locker? 1024 01:20:13,137 --> 01:20:15,470 I thought it would put things in perspective. 1025 01:20:15,640 --> 01:20:18,336 It's kind of sad. We need to let them out. 1026 01:20:18,510 --> 01:20:21,707 They need to know the world is bigger than that. 1027 01:20:21,880 --> 01:20:23,369 Still a rookie. 1028 01:20:26,583 --> 01:20:27,743 Whoa.